For such, indeed, is the Kingdom of Heaven

A pious and honest merchant fell asleep one night beside his beloved wife only to abruptly awaken in the middle of a vast desert. He climbed the nearest sand dune but, from that vantage point, could spy nothing but further dunes vanishing into the distance.

Unable to tell the proper direction for prayer, and having no other business on which to profitably employ himself, the merchant began making his prostrations in a methodical manner moving in a clockwise direction from an arbitrary starting point on the compass.

Suddenly, rising from prayer, the merchant saw a vast caravenserai directly before him. Could this be a miracle from God? Or was it a delusive mirage?

Having nothing to lose, the merchant ran towards it. As he approached, the great gates of the caravanserai slowly opened and a splendid khidmatgar of more than mortal stature issued forth to welcome him.

"Are you a djinn?" the merchant asked

"A djinn but of the Believer," the khidmatgar replied, "and of the Believers, amongst those opposed to hypocrisy but enjoined to always speak the Truth".

The Merchant was greatly relieved to hear this.

"Could you provide me food and drink- and that too of the sort which is lawful?"

"I can provide anything for which you can pay in coin, true and not counterfeit."

"But I have no money with me!"

"It is a property of the caravanserai that whosoever is of the Believers, let him put his hand to his cummerbund and he will find there sufficient coin to pay for whatever is necessary to his survival."

The Merchant made a judicious choice of food and beverage of a quality and quantity sufficient for the maintenance of health but not the stimulation of appetite, or after the usages of profligacy.

Having satisfied his nutritional needs, the merchant put his hand to his cummerbund and found there the exact sum required to discharge the full price of his meal.

Pocketing the coins, the djinn threw the merchant down upon his belly and anally raped him in a manner brutal and disobliging.

"Wherefore this outrage?" wailed the Merchant greatly discomfited.

"Next time, buddy" the djinn, through clenched teeth, replied. "maybe you'll remember to tip!"

Sooth speaketh Iqbal- that learned Alim- if an individual says 'an'al haq' punishment is better.

If a nation speaks thus- it is not illicit.'

For such, indeed, is the Kingdom of Heaven not that other thing I mentioned in my last parable.